Socializing has come a long way since I became a mom. Discovering I was pregnant was not met at any point with the thought of when to make it Facebook official. Or any other equivalent social networking site either. Eleven years ago Pinterest, Instagram, and Twitter weren't around, and Facebook had literally just come about.
I never gave any thought to unique and exciting ways to announce my pregnancies. Or tried to pick the perfect timing. Nor did I consider celebrating the milestones of my kids' childhood this publicly. Or open up my family's life like I've done. However, today that has become a big part of the decisions I make all the time.
It's as present on my mind after I see those two little lines as "oh crap when was my last period?" This thought may not be relatable to everyone; but living so far away from the majority of people who matter in our lives, I honestly can't help it.
Social networking is a huge part of my family's day to day. Some days I'm perfectly okay with this, some days not so much. I accept, however, that this dulls a lot of the pain for the grandmas missing their grandkids right now. So I will continue to do so.
My kids' grandparents, greats, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends get to be a part of their lives because the power of Facebook. To me that makes it worth it.
Since these sites have become increasingly popular over the last few years it's hard to ignore the desire to join in on the fun. Even not being far away from family and friends.
With my last two pregnancies and my own increased use it has become more apparent that there are so many ideas I wish I would've recorded for my first four kids.
Exciting pregnancy announcements, gender reveals, crafty celebration pieces for your home, milestone markers for ages, grades, life events, all things I never thought about until I became addicted to Pinterest. All things that now that I'm adding a sixth child to my brood feel slightly less exciting to share.
Seriously. How many people are enthusiastic towards a mother of five inviting you to her gender reveal party for baby number six? How many enjoy seeing the many growing belly shots of yet another pregnancy? How many people care what you're craving? Or what's happening in this week of pregnancy?
Now swap out mother of five with first time mom. Tell me I'm not the only person who can see the difference?
Google "pregnancy announcement for fifth child" though and see what you find.
I think it would be awesome to be a first time mom right now. The ideas you have at the tip of your fingers because of social media are endless. So for veteran moms like me it's kind of sad missing out on moments like these.
I know. I know. There are many people out there who couldn't care less if this is your first or your twelth. Babies are either exciting or they aren't. But, being a veteran mom, expecting yet another bundle of joy, I can't help but notice how silly I feel posting anything about the milestones of this pregnancy.
Maybe it's because there aren't many new and exciting things that happen when you've been pregnant as many times as I have. Sure there are plenty of new things that can happen, but "new" is usually never coupled with "exciting." It's usually more in the ballpark of horrifying, hellish, or at the very least unpleasant.
When I scroll through my news feed and see the updates of a first time mom, I can't help but feel nostalgic. The wonder of the unknown, the joy of what's to come, the nervous anticipation of what to expect. All amazing parts of experiencing child rearing for the very first time. Or even the second or third for that matter.
When I see the awesome YouTube videos, the amazing photography ideas, the effort and love that reaches all corners of the earth; I battle the urge to be overflowing with happiness for them with being incredibly jealous.
When it comes time for your fourth, fifth, or sixth, to me, it seems like you aren't expected to act as happy.
Having another baby are ya? You do know what causes that right? Were you trying for another baby? So who's getting fixed now?
Questions people seem to think are perfectly within their right to ask. So imagine the reaction to that group picture you're trying to take with everyone saying "Saaayyy Susie's Pregnant!" Instead of the usual "say cheese." Sure you're going to wind up sharing some interesting expressions, but how many of those are going to be looks of excitement instead of the again? faces.
Now, do any of these feelings of hesitancy stop me from pinning four hundred pins of baby gear, announcement, and photo ideas on Pinterest? Hell no. A good idea is a good idea. At worst, I just owe my older kids an apology for not doing as many awesome activities through the early years with them. My bad kids. I was a newbie at the internet.
Facebook and Instagram become a whole new arena though. Being that these two platforms are specifically designed to socialize on. As much as I try to I can't get over feeling like no one cares about how big my belly is, what week of pregnancy I'm on, if I'm craving gummy bears and French fries, or what piece of produce my unborn child is measuring in line with this week.
I want to proceed on my way capturing these moments regardless. I just feel reluctant to share my excitement with those I connect with online. And yep, it is my Facebook and yes I can post whatever the Hell I want. I'm just considerate of my friends and I do take the time to decide how well a post will be received before I put it up. You're welcome by the way.
So I suppose to the other veteran moms who feel this way, I say to you, screw everyone else. Yeah, I don't share as much as I probably would've been able to with my first or second, but I'm not going to refrain altogether. I will go on about the next several months celebrating this new life I'm adding to my family. And for the record, I am one of those people who are excited to see any new addition you have to your family as well. No pregnancy will be identical, no child the same, so do whatever you want during this time.
With all the negativity in the world it is a welcome change to see so much positive in your life. And I will stand by my desire to see a growing bump next to a chalkboard before another damn bathroom selfie any day of the week.
Embrace each moment because the way I see it, it may not be your first child and you may already have one of each gender, but this very well could be your last experience as a pregnant woman. This may be the last time you feel the kick of life within you, the last time you have an opportunity to blame all the nasty moods, excessive sleeping, weird food cravings on something other than just being a strange and crazy person. Document and share at your leisure because you have the ability and no one has the right to make you feel like you shouldn't.
No comments:
Post a Comment